A proposal to the Academy of English concerning the word Queue
It has often been observed that the word queue is pronounced the same as the letter Q, and that therefore the remaining letters serve no useful purpose. Typically this is followed by a recommendation that the remaining letters be removed. While this is clearly an unacceptable situation, I believe that there is a better solution.
I propose to the august members of the Academy of English that they introduce regular updates to the word queue. Once a year, the first letter should be removed on the assumption that it has had ample time to complete its business at the front, and it is now the next letter’s turn.
Thus, in the subsequent year the word would be spelled ueue, and pronounced the same as the letter U. The following year it would become eue, pronounced E.
From time to time, the Academy should announce new letters that have joined the end of the word. This is sure to excite great public interest, and provide valuable media attention to lesser-known letters.